gistfile1.txt

Share your IT job interview experience.

>Came in
>they asked me whether I use linux
>say yes
>they asked me whether I use it as a desktop OS
>say yes
>get shown the way out


>came in
>interviewer asks if i use some hipster bullshit called 'emacs'
>stand up
>call him a macfag
>walk out


>Came in
>What are your primary qualifications?
>I installed Gentoo
>Welcome aboard!


>came in
>interviewer is bearded fellow, the sys admin
>stench is unbearable
>stutters when he asks what distro i use and what my favorite dwm is
>do a 360 and walk the fuck out

>walk into interview
>interviewer is stallman
>he asks me what i have done to enable free software
>tell him i create proprietary applications to allow wabbos to have virtual girlfriends
>hugs me and gives me a free bottle of pepsi

>dumb HR bitch
>wants me to do asynchronous requesting in java
>easy as fuck
>tell her I'm done
>she can't into code
>she only checks whether it compiles or not
>hired

>came in
>interview bureau is actually a 4D-hyperdimensional cube
>came in again three more times

>came in
>given shitty written "logical aptitude test"
>test is just making flowcharts
>finish in 10 minutes out of the hour given
>score full marks
>don't get hired because I didn't take long enough

>come in
>they ask me if I have a good understanding of theoretical physics
>I tell them I have a theoretical degree in physics
>hired on the spot


>came in
>they asked me if I knew about macs
>I asked them if I looked like I had a dildo up my ass
>they asked me if I knew about windows
>I told them what brazzers accounts and passwords they had, all picked up through the back door in windows
>hired

>come in
>only see computer screen
>It's an arch live cd login. Somebody echo'd "install this, then we'll hire you"
lel, this is going to be easy!
Download AUR, run AIS script, everything goes flawlessly...
>until I realized it's a uefi system, start over, make efi system partition, and realize the script fails at mounting the efi partition, which makes it impossible to install the bootloader
>Walk 360 degrees and turn away, flaming helmuthdu as I come home

>One of the interviewers has really big boobs.
>My eyes wander during the entire Interview.
>Don't get hired because I'm a pervert.

>came in
>interviewer has the wrong resume
>i put her in her place for being unprepared
>she thinks i'm a boss and hires me
>i fingerbang her when the interview finishes
>she has 4 of my children
>i become cio of company and fire her
>haven't paid a single penny in child support


>Interview brat for some junior position
>Ask why he left his old job
>"I have perfected development, so I want a new challange"
>Show him the door after 10 mins.

>came in
>job opening in security
>interviewer asks if I had experience in C
>no
>interviewer asks if I had experience in network security
>no
>get thrown out the back door